Amerika

Continuing from Part 3: The Ultimate Choice, Part 2: Decisions, Decisions, and Part 1: Alone No More.

Monday came without the usual depressive attitude that had poisoned his life for a number of years.  Calvin actually looked forward to going to the office for once.  Xavier was eager to hear about the details of his weekend encounter (He hadn’t told him where he was going nor anything about the white advocacy convention.).  He said that everything went well with Tracy and that they were planning to keep on seeing each other when he moved. He made a note to get in touch with the moving company this afternoon and to contact Candace and his parents about the job change.  They would probably have a lot of questions that he didn’t look forward to answering.  He also needed to travel to the new site and look for an apartment as well as meet the staff and director of the company.  He seemed to process the claims on his desk with more energy and precision.  He would try to reach Tracy this evening and see how she felt about what had happened.

When he got home, his first call was to Candace to let her know about the coming change of job and city.  Josh, her husband, answered and asked if everything was okay.  Calvin called very infrequently except prior to his usual visits.  Calvin said that he needed to talk to Candace about a personal matter.  Josh was not one of his favorite relatives.  “She’s right here.”  Candace picked up the receiver and asked if Calvin were okay.  “Yeah, I’m doing fine.  I just wanted to tell you that I’ve been given a promotion and I’ll be moving to another city.” Candace reacted with surprise and congratulations.  Calvin filled her in on the details and she asked him about how he felt about the change.  “Fine.  I’m really excited about the new job.”  He suppressed the urge to tell her also about Tracy and his recent trip.  She was very liberal and an activist in the local Democratic Party. In the past she had even been a delegate to the national convention. She and Calvin had often argued about Biden’s presidency and his political strategies. She didn’t need to know about his joining Freedom for the Right and the convention.  She would probably like Tracy but not her political orientation.  Candace reminded him to get in touch with their parents and let them know.  Calvin sensed that there was no turning back after the call.  There was no way now to change his mind without having to explain in detail his reasons to the entire family.

After work, he went to the gym and worked out to let off steam and make sure his muscles were toned.  He wanted to look his best from now on.  Later, he called Tracy after dinner but got her voice mail once again.  She was probably involved with family matters.  He desperately wanted to hear her voice, if nothing else.  He went to bed hoping she would get in touch tomorrow.  He was aroused by imagining the contours of her body and fearful that she might not call as before.  He didn’t sleep very well.

In the morning Hunter took him into the inner office and introduced him to  Bill Stricklin, Calvin’s new boss, who was in town for business reasons.  After a long session that outlined his responsibilities, Hunter suggested they have lunch at the club he belonged to and continue the conversation. Calvin had never been to the revolving restaurant at the top of the city’s highest sky-scraper; he was awed by the sweeping panorama of the surrounding area and the sight of planes coming in to land at the airport.  His head was spinning as they headed back to the office; nonetheless, he felt he could handle whatever he had to do at his new job.  For a while he had forgotten Tracy and the weekend at Clarksville.

At a little after ten o’clock when he had given up hope that Tracy would call, his cell phone rang.  He saw that it was Tracy on the line; he was a little irritated that she had waited so late to get in touch, but he picked up the phone with anticipation.  Once again she apologized for the late call, but she had been involved with several matters during the day. “Oh, Calvin, if you only knew,” she said with a tone of weariness and resignation.  She explained how, after Sunday dinner (her term for the noon-day meal) the children had become very stand-offish and even sullen.  Kaitlin had asked why Tracy was involved with those “fascists” that her classmates were making fun of.  She was embarrassed because a couple of her friends were Hispanic and she felt she couldn’t invite them home. Then, there was Niaomi who was a Nigerian exchange student and whom she really liked.  If she invited her, would she be comfortable or would her mother make some insulting comment about her heritage?  To make matters worse, Scott had felt that the convention-goers seemed to be a lot of old guy “losers” and he didn’t understand what she saw in Calvin.  When compared to his father’s success, what did Calvin have to offer?  Tracy had tried to explain that they could invite their friends over, although she preferred they cultivate young people of a similar background.  She also tried to defend Calvin by saying that he wasn’t as outgoing as their father, but he was an intelligent and good person who had conservative beliefs.  “That’s great!” Kaitlin told her with disgust.  “Now you’re promoting racism with this guy—your boyfriend–and embarrassing both of us.”

Tracy had attempted before to explain her commitment to the white advocacy movement to the children, but they didn’t listen.  The teachers at their schools were always celebrating black accomplishments and how systemically racist all white people were. They were required to learn the tenets of “Critical Race Theory” that demeaned every white political figure of importance since the founding of the nation.

Every time you turned on the television, Tracy lamented, you would see mixed-race couples in pharmaceutical ads (normally a black male and white female) although they were only a small portion of married couples nationally. You would never see an Asian male with an African American spouse.  That combination would alienate the Asian market in America.  The advertising gurus knew as much and they tailored their racial pairings to given markets and ethnic tolerances. The only reason for this miscegenation fad was propaganda.  Corporate America was selling the woke narrative as a normal way of life. In progressive eyes, Tracy added, Freedom for the Right advocates were nothing more than white rebels and malcontents who were a danger to public safety and resentful of losing their dominance in the new “color-blind” American society.  Tracy found this characterization unfounded and defamatory. They were decent, hard-working folks who had simply had enough of being despised and ridiculed by the national media.

In spite of her spirited defense of white advocacy, it was all for naught; both children were indifferent to her arguments. Their eyes had glazed over and they seemed embarrassed.  Nothing Tracy could say to the contrary would change their minds.

In addition, she had to get them ready for spending the week with their father who lived out of town.  It was his turn to keep them.  Charles was also appalled by Tracy’s commitments and, as a countermeasure,  he made it a point to preach woke philosophy to them at every opportunity.  Being white was a privilege that the children needed to understand; they were obliged to atone for the horrible things their forefathers had done.  The blacks and minorities had been victims of prejudice and colonial mistreatment for several centuries.  No wonder they couldn’t succeed in today’s society!  Every white person should be ashamed for the cruel actions and misdeeds of their ancestors.  At his university, professors and staff were required to read material about this neglect and need for moral atonement.  Systemic racism had to be stamped out, by force if necessary.  In his opinion, anyone who objected needed to be censured if not fired.

After this tirade, Tracy again burst into tears.  Calvin could only listen and try to commiserate but he sensed it did little good.  She added that after this tumultuous afternoon and evening, Stephen (whom Calvin had met at the convention) had phoned and insisted that she give him another chance (That’s all she needed!). He understood what he had done wrong and was willing to change.  He still loved her and thought about her all the time. They could, he was convinced, “work something out.”

Tracy could hardly repeat what he had said; she knew he was lying and setting a trap for her.  He had been harassing her now for months; he would call on a regular basis.  In her eyes Calvin was a decent person and someone she had sincere feelings for; he wasn’t the quiet “loser” they pretended he was.  She was at the end of her rope with all this nonsense.  In spite of everything, her convictions were well-founded and she wouldn’t back down and seek forgiveness from the establishment figures.  Something had to be done or the white population in this country would eventually be subjugated by progressive zealots who continually preached climate change-carbon free environment and racial diversity.  She didn’t want her America to become Brazil or Africa.  It had to stay a country of European origins and ideals.  Just look at what was happening in South Africa!

Calvin had listened to this outpouring of distress and rage from Tracy with admiration and compassion.  Her predicament was similar to his own, yet she had the courage to go public and pursue her dreams.  In the back of his mind, he recognized that being well-to-do also helped to shore up one’s courage and fighting spirit.  He felt more than love for her: he had a profound respect.  She knew how to fight and defend herself.

He said a few things about his preparations for changing jobs and moving to a new city, but he could tell that Tracy had little interest in these details.  She was consumed by her own problems.  Suddenly, she said: “I really miss you.  Is there any way you could come to Clarksville sometime…maybe in a few days or so?  It would make me feel a lot better.”  Then, as an afterthought, “You could stay here in the house.  The children will be gone for a while.  We’ll be careful so the neighbors won’t gossip.”  Calvin was taken aback again by her assertiveness and candor.  He reminded Stacy that he had to work and couldn’t just take off on a whim.  She countered with: “Don’t you have a few vacation days you could use if you’re leaving your job?  The administration lets me take personal time off at the university.” Calvin admitted that he would try.  That was something he hadn’t thought of.  Maybe he could tell Hunter he needed to see about his parents who were not in the best of health.  That just might work.

When he hung up, his mind was churning with ideas and combinations he had never considered before.  Tracy was a very persuasive individual who was used to getting her way. The very possibility of spending three or four days with her was intoxicating.

On the other hand, he would have no way out—no excuse–in Clarksville.  If anyone caught them together in the house alone, it might  become a local scandal.  People in that area were a lot less open-minded than in urban centers.  He really needed to take care of matters here first, but the thought of having her all to himself was overwhelming.  Deep down he knew it would be a mistake, something he would probably regret later.  Calvin was aware he was living on the edge and getting involved in emotional commitments that he wasn’t equipped to handle. He couldn’t get Tracy out of his thoughts.  He would ask Hunter for a few days off.

Tags: culture clash by jonathan sawyer, fiction